Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Why Can't We Be Friends?

Ok, I know - I get inspired, write a few blog posts, then fall off the face of the Earth. This is my standard operating procedure and I've accepted it. You should too.

Let's get to the point.


Parenting is hard enough - why do we feel the need to judge or criticize other moms who may be desperately trying to make it through another day? We don't know everyone's story, so how can we make accurate assumptions? We can't. Sure, one day I may actually do my hair & makeup and waltz into the local Target in non-yoga pants with my charming Bear Cub who decides to give a dashing smile to every woman in sight.

But most days? Most days I consider it a victory if the Bear Cub and I make it out the door with pants on. (Today, he made it 45 minutes before blowing out of his shorts. Such is life.)

Anyway, Mom-Shaming is real and it needs to stop. I'm sure this isn't a recent phenomenon, but with the rise of social media, mom-shaming is all of sudden the source of tweets, posts, instagram's, hashtags, etc for the public eye. Whether it's in the form of overt opinions ("BREAST IS BEST!") or the not-so-subtle humblebrag, ("Boo! I can't wear my favorite jeans because I've lost so much weight baby-wearing.") I don't expect all moms to agree on the same philosophies, but I do expect a reasonable amount of respect. Differing opinions are ok - inducing shame & guilt for those differences is not. I think Mom-Shaming causes unnecessary insecurity, doubt, and low self-esteem. Regrettably, I have succumbed to this behavior and please believe me when I say I'm working on it. I've been convicted of my thoughts because I don't want other moms whispering behind my back when I'm trying so hard to keep us all alive.

So what if a mom uses formula over breast-feeding? Cloth diapers or disposable? Child-led weaning? Technology-use? Toddler breastfeeding? Sleep training or co-sleeping? Homemade or store-bought? Natural foods or Happy Meals? Spanking or time-outs? Ultimately, we are called by God to raise our children in His image for His glory. He will not reward based upon Earthly principles and standards, so really, us moms should breathe a huge sigh of relief. (I would, but I'm so out of shape I'm sure I'll end up in a coughing fit.)

Hang in there. We're in this mess together.

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