Let me start by saying that I hate, absolutely hate, mornings - especially Monday mornings - and I do everything possible to avoid the inevitable. I hit my snooze button approximately 6 times, I drag my sorry butt into the shower where I have (more than once) fallen asleep under the soothing hot water, I stand in my closet for 10 minutes staring at my wardrobe in hopes that something new and exciting will magically appear, I finally get dressed and climb back into bed until my husband gets annoyed with my wet hair, I reluctantly do my hair and makeup, eat a measly breakfast while catching Al Roker's weather report, and am out the door by 7:58am. Yes, I start work at 8:00am. Don't judge me.
On this particular Monday morning I was in desperate need of coffee and since I left myself no time to brew a pot at home, I decided to stop at the local McDonald's. (I am on a budget. Don't judge me.) When I pulled into the drive-thru, an older woman in a beat-up Mazda was already ordering so I took my place behind her and waited patiently. TEN MINUTES LATER she finally finished ordering and pulled through to pay. I quickly looked at the screen and noticed that she had ordered fifty dollars worth of breakfast food. $50 at McDonald's?! For breakfast?! For ONE WOMAN?! Geez o pete -- so I ordered my simple small, decaf, black coffee and proceeded to the first window where again I fell behind Ms. McEatsalot. After paying for her smorgasbord in one dollar bills (seriously, I can't make this stuff up), I finally made it to the window.
McDonald's employee: "Hi! You had two McGriddle's, one without cheese; one sausage McMuffin, one Big Breakfast with extra syrup, a medium iced Mocha with sugar-free vanilla syrup, and an extra hashbrown?"
Me: "No. Just a small, decaf coffee."
After trying to figure out her mistake with the help of two managers, I paid my $1.16 and pulled around to find none other than Ms.McEatsalot at the window ORDERING MORE FOOD! I sat there for a good five minutes while she dug around her purse for change to buy another orange juice. Seriously. Once I finally got my coffee not only was it cold, it wasn't decaf, and I was ten minutes late to work.
Happy freakin' Monday.