You guys, I am so unbelievably content. Not happy, because happiness is a fleeting emotion that can change on a whim, but content: at peace with the life God has given me.
These past 8 months have been one heck of a ride, to say the least. God has used this time to test my faith and through days of solitude, He forced me to rely on Him for comfort, direction, and provision. Back in January, when I lived in a perpetual state of misery and sweatpants, I couldn't believe that we had given up our safe and comfortable lives in Bourbonnais for this. We had everything we thought we needed: a home, full-time jobs, friends, family...but God has showed me that He did not intend for the Man and I to live a "safe" life.
When I was in high school/college, I really struggled with my identity and finding my place in this world. One night my mom and I were having a conversation about my purpose and she told me that God created two types of people: marshmallows and steel. Steel has to withstand the hottest and most brutal fires in order to reach its full potential. It's not glamorous or flashy, but tough and strong. Marshmallows are fluffy and sweet and overall wonderful, but cannot survive the flames. She then pointed a finger at me and declared with such conviction, "You, Lauren, are NOT a marshmallow."
If I was a marshmallow, I never would have moved down here. I would have stayed in Bourbonnais where I was safe and continued to live my fluffy marshmallowy life. God knows what the Man and I can handle, and though there have been many fires, we are confident that we will not be consumed. Our relationship is so much stronger, both with the Lord and with each other. This is were God wants us and I am content in Him.
So very content.